The Yin and Yang of Weddings

Weddings. Is there ever a time so special in ones…… OOps, sorry wrong script…

Let’s face it. Weddings in the best of times can be a bit a pain in the butt. However, planning a wedding when the bottom drops out of the economy can be downright depressing.

THE YIN
Our wedding is to take place on a charming island in the Caribbean. White sand, blue water, sun, me, her, all our friends, family… what could be better? We planned to keep it small, under 40 people. The wedding is on the beach, with a beach BBQ afterward accompanied by a DJ. Then it is off to the Honeymoon suite to knock-up, impregnate, make sweet music with my newly minted wife… BLISS

THE YANG
With amazing alacrity, the economy nosedived and with it most of the RSVPs to the wedding. One by one, friends who were so excited to come and frolic in the surf for a week and have a vacation while watching their friends get hitched came to realize the reality of their situation: no one’s job is safe. Belt tightening is a must. Our guest roster dropped from 40 to 13 people (including me and the prewife)

Now let me go on record as saying that I do not blame any single one of our friends. Flying thousands of miles to a foreign country to stay in expensive hotels is a lot of cash to spend, especially in these times. Personally, I am thankful we have the cash to go and get hitched.

The amazing thing about my prewife is that with all the changes and the frantic emails back and forth with the wedding planner and our friends dropping off the roster like flies, she has been resilient, taking the whole thing in stride. Quips like “more food for us”, “more intimate”, etc. grace her lips as she adroitly adjusts to the new reality of our wedding on a daily basis.

I have seen other prewives crumble into a heap over less.

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What to do about THE Ultimatum

GirlI was talking with a friend the other day who has received THE ultimatum from his girlfriend. She has decreed over text message the seventh inning stretch, that he has three to six months in which to shit propose or get off the pot she’ll move out of their current living situation.

Apparently, her sentiments were exacerbated by my own proposal to the PreWife. It is one thing to tell friends over the phone or via email that you got engaged and then enjoy the thanks from her father and praise from them for your happy occasion. It is quite another thing entirely to meet up with your paired off friends and find that after the women are done oogling the .005 carat huge rock on your PreWife’s finger, they tend to look at their own Men and make a determination that either it is time to move on and get engaged or it is time to move out. Ouch!

So, what’s a guy to do?

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The reason she is my PreWife

Testing the watersToday is nothing but accolades as usual for the prewife. First off, she has purchased her wedding gown. Not only that, in a feat of Herculean Athenian show of stength, will, determination and love for my cheap sorry ass, the grand total came to $500 That’s right $500 for a wedding dress. That is just unheard of. Not only that, but it fit her right off the rack.
Wait! It gets better! It took her about 30 minutes to pick it out (yes I was there).

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Welcome to PreWife.com

So, you may be scratching your head asking yourself, “UUmmmm, what just happened?” Don’t panic. What happened is nothing different then when you were in college, or even high school. First there were your good intentions to make her an honest (no, really) woman. Then there was some alcohol. After a few drinks, there was too much alcohol. Then there was that blackout for 5 hours until you woke up the next morning and the women in the bed next to you was crying, but not because of anything bad you did the night before (for once).
Ok, now you can panic. It turns out you proposed to your sweetie of _____ years, months, days (or If you are in Vegas) hours. That tender smile on her face and that 2 carat rock weighing down her finger are all the signs you need to know that life as you know it is about to change forever. That’s what PREWIFE.com is all about. How to get ready for her both of your big day. If you feel you need a break from all the freedom that is vaporizing in front of your eyes, head on over to our other site MANCAVESITE.COM and feel the warm breeze of testosterone.

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